Chapter- 40

Ekta looked fascinated by the spectacle going on before her. The great Ekansh Sehgal groveling for his sister’s forgiveness. Though she was yet to understand the reason behind it, the entire scene amused her greatly. She never thought that one day she would witness Ekansh roaming around the house behind his little sister like a whimpering little pup caught in the rain.

And Eshita... the girl was in full ignore-him-completely mode. Everything Ekansh did, she ignored royally. His words went unheard, his apologies didn’t matter, neither did his efforts of self-roasting.

“Esha yaar, sun na.” Ekansh whined like a teenager. Who on earth would say that the feared businessman was begging before his sister’s forgiveness? His ruthless image in the market would crumble into dust.

Eshita settled down on the couch, turning on the TV. Earlier she had been angry that he got hurt, but now... she was enjoying her bhaiya’s attention a bit too much.

They had always been like this. Whenever she sulked, even over the tiniest issues’, so much as her doll being tossed away by him’, she wouldn’t talk to him for days and absolutely loved the way he buzzed around her like a bee doing everything she wanted. After five years, she was experiencing that childish victory all over again and wasn’t in the mood to let it go so easily. She was born to make her brother’s life difficult, and she intended to live up to that title.

Ekansh stood before her, blocking her view. “Tu baat kar rahi hai ya nhi mere se?” His tone sternened. “Dekh ab zyada ho raha hai huh. Acche se baat kar warna accha nhi hoga.”

Eshita raised an eyebrow, unamused. “Ekta... kisi ko zara bata toh. Jab log gussa hote hai toh unhe manaya jata hai. Aur gussa nhi dilaya jata.”

Ekta straightened up. Now why was she dragged into their war?

Ekansh groaned in frustration. “Manane ke liye kisi ki baat bhi suni padti hai, Esha. What is wrong with you? Tu meri baat bhi nahi sun...” He stopped abruptly as a pillow came flying straight at his face. He caught it, lowering the cushion slowly and glaring at the culprit.

Eshita glared back. “What? Gussa mein hu. You are the guilty one here. Don’t you dare play the elder brother card now.”

Ekansh threw away the cushion, annoyed. Now he realized the smirk his father had shot him yesterday. It wasn’t sympathy but amusement. His father knew it wouldn’t be easy, and Ekansh cursed himself for forgetting how hard it was to deal with the scowling wildcat of their house. This felt like his punishment for forgetting it all in the first place.

“What do you want?” He asked, surrendering.

Since morning he had been offering her favorite dishes, apologizing, even explaining himself, not once asking what she actually wanted him to do like she had always done for him.

Eshita leaned back on the couch thoughtfully. “You are an idiot,” She stated, meeting his gaze.

Ekansh sighed, nodding. “The biggest one on the planet.”

“You are a complete idiot!” Eshita emphasized dramatically.

Again, an accepting nod, “I know that too.”

Eshita opened her mouth to continue her list of insults when the guards entered carrying two large baskets of flowers overflowing from the edges. She rose to her feet excitedly. They were for the upcoming Navratri celebration.

Ekansh took the baskets, dismissing the guards with a nod. “Itne saare, Eshu?” He asked, confused. “Zyada nhi hai?”

Eshita shrugged sheepishly. “I also think the same. Maine Mumma ki diary dekh kar order kiye the. Usme five kgs likha tha... Mujhe nhi pata tha ki itne saare aa jayenge.”

“It’s okay,” Ekansh reassured. “We can return them.”

“No.” Eshita protested immediately. “The vendors... I paid them already. I don’t think they will take it back.”

“We can keep however much we want and return the remaining to them. About the money... let them keep it. I won’t ask them to return.”

Ekta stepped forward. Her feet shook slightly as she bent down, running her fingers through the mogra flowers. Memories rushed back unexpectedly.

“Can we keep them?” She asked quietly, gaining their attention.

Ekansh and Eshita shared a quick glance.

Ekansh crouched beside Ekta. “Kya hua?” The tears shimmering in her eyes all of a sudden confused him.

Ekta shook her head immediately, rising to her feet. “Ku-kuch nhi. Main toh bas aise hi puch rahi thi. Aage aapki marzi.”

“Ekta...” Ekansh’s tone was firm yet gentle. “Jis tarah Eshita apni pasand-naapasand bina kisi rok-tok ke rakhti hai, waise tu bhi rakh sakti hai. We are here to listen to you. There is no need to carry everything alone. Maine tujhe kitni baar kaha hai, mere liye tu aur Esha ek ho. It just depends on how much you consider us your own...”

“Aisi baat nhi hai, bhaiya.” Ekta cut him off softly. “Main bas aapko pareshan....”

She trailed off, noticing the glare Ekansh shot her way. She knew her thoughts mattered. She mattered. Everything related to her was equally important to Ekansh, just like it had been before he knew her truth. Truth be told, nothing had changed between them despite him knowing the darkness she had lived through. He was still being himself’, the brother she had always known, the one who never once looked at her differently.

Even the noises inside her head had calmed up, the negative questions constantly clawing at her mind in the continuous presence of Ekansh or sometimes Eshita being around her. None of them left her alone even for a second with herself, and she was grateful for that.

The only problem was that she wasn’t expressive like Eshita. She never got a chance to share her past for obvious reasons, but now that she finally had one, she simply didn’t know how to begin or where to start.

“Mere gaon mein yeh phool ke bahut bagiche hote the.” She tried smiling through the tears gathering in her eyes. “Maa roz subah pooja ke liye mala apne haathon se sajjoti thi.”

Her gaze drifted to the overflowing basket. “Aur mere liye gajre banati thi. Bachpan mein mujhe chameli ke phoolon ki khushboo bahut pasand thi. Kabhi kabhi zayda dhoop ki wajha se phool murja jaate. Tb Maa padosiyon se poocke agar koi sheher ja raha toh unhe phool lene kheti.”

A small smile trembled on her lips. “Taki vo mere liye mala baana sake.”

Ekansh pulled her in a side hug gently, “You are missing her?”

Ekta’s smile faltered. “I-I miss her every day. It’s just... Sometimes I try to avoid thinking about her. Jitna maa ke baare mein sochti hu utna hi uss din ki yaad aati hai. Uss pal... Meri wajah se...”

“Teri wajah se teri maa ko kuch nhi hua hai, Ekta.” Ekansh interjected firmly. He turned her to face him, cradling her face in his palm. “Jo kuch bhi hua usme teri koi galti nhi thi. It was a husband’s failure!  A father’s failure! Tujhe kisi ko blame hi karna hai toh apne baba ko tu jitna chahe blame kar sakti hai. You can even curse your brother. But by blaming yourself you are insulting your mother’s love for you.”

Ekta gasped in shock as tears overflowed.

Ekansh wiped them away. “Ek maa ne apni beti ke liye wahi kiya jo unhe karna chaiye tha. It wasn’t her obligation or responsibility, but her love for her daughter. Tujhe kya lagta hai tu apne aapko blame karegi toh unhe accha lagta hoga yeh sab sun kar? Unhe hurt nhi hota hoga? Ki jis beti ko unhone janam diya wahi aaj apne aapko ek aisi cheez ke liye kos rahi hai jisme uski koi galti hi nhi thi.”

Ekta’s gaze lowered. Like always Ekansh’s words reached her, but they collided with years of accusations from her brother. Suraj had blamed her for her own mother’s death. He had even cursed her for being his sister, for being their mother’s daughter. Even if she wanted to believe what Ekansh was saying, a little part of her still whispered the same thing... what if she wasn’t really born into the family? Would they have been happier without her?

“Ekta?” Eshita’s voice snapped her out of her thoughts.

She looked at the girl and reality hit her. Eshita had again heard everything. The bits and pieces that were meant to be only Ekansh’s to know. Knowingly or unknowingly, Eshita had once again gotten entangled with them.

“Inn phoolo se kya karna hai tumhe pata hai?” Eshita asked, trying to divert Ekta’s thoughts. The look on the girl’s face clearly stated that she understood what Ekansh said but didn’t agree with it. She didn’t want her to go back into her sad shell. The girl rarely remained calm and normal; she wished to keep it that way for as long as possible.

Ekta nodded uncertainly. “Aapka dev ghar bada hai. We can decorate it with these flowers. Kaafi saari maale ban jayengi par mujhe banana nhi aata.”

“Tu uski chinta mat kar. Mujhe aata hai na.” Eshita squealed happily. “Just help me with what I need to do and we will use them all. Okay?”

Ekta nodded, looking away. Eshita was being kind. Again. The girl had always been kind, but her trying to include her in everything... she was feeling strangely warm and that bothered her.

Ekansh stepped back, letting his sister change the topic. It’s not easy to wipe off years of self-hatred and guilt. He should at least be at ease that Ekta was slowly, steadily sharing her thoughts, her past images with him. It was on him how he saw through her overthinking thoughts, dissected it, and helped her heal. He could read Eshita like the back of his hand. Soon he hoped he would be able to read Ekta too with that much clarity to help her.

Eshita cleared her throat dramatically. “Pick up the baskets and keep them near the temple.” She commanded.

Ekansh sighed. “And you will give in after that?”

Eshita’s eyes sparkled with mischief. “Hum, sochenge. Abhi ke liye aap wahi kariye jo aapse kaha gaya hai. Warna hum krodhit ho jayenge, balak.”

Ekansh glared at the brat. “Zyada nhi bol rahi hai tu...” He took a threatening step towards her.

Eshita shrieked, running away before he could catch her. She had riled him up enough, for the rest she would find a different way. The list was too long!

Ekta smiled faintly. She looked on as Ekansh picked up the baskets. “Help karu?”

Ekansh shook his head. “Teri bhen ko pata chala toh mera murder kar degi. Let me do it. Tu ja tab tak padhai kar. I will come help you with math.”

Ekta stared at his retreating figure. How easily he said your sister. How easily Eshita said our brother. How could the Sehgal siblings be so generous, so open-hearted? Them always welcoming her was beyond her understanding. It overwhelmed her heart in ways she never expected. Nevertheless, after years of rejection and being denied affection, a part of her had slowly started accepting the love she had always craved for but never believed she deserved.

✨✨✨

Eshita played with the dough that felt sticky, stubborn, and utterly uncooperative in her hands’, the flour dust painting her black T-shirt while her cheeks were tainted with white streaks. She was on a mission to make a perfect roti dough, but her lack of cooking skills was written clearly on her face.

Frustrated, she picked up the bowl to throw it away when a pair of hands stopped her immediately.

“Kya kar rahi hai!” Ekansh chided, taking away the bowl and keeping it out of her reach.

“Hato bhaiya,” Eshita hissed, “I will throw it away.”

“Eshita! Khana hai vo. Khana phenkna kab se seekha tune?” He scolded. “Aur yeh kya haal bana rakha hai apna? What the hell were you doing?”

Eshita shot him an annoyed glare. “Dance practice kar rahi thi aate ke saath. Wanna try?”

Ekansh exhaled sharply, holding her arm and dragging her toward the sink. “Wash your hands.”

“I need to make the dough....”

“NOW, Eshita!” Ekansh ordered.

Eshita poked her tongue out at him childishly before turning toward the sink and washing her hands. “Why do you have to be so annoying? Bhulo mat, I am still angry at you, okay? Aur meri kya galti? Ab vo aata mujhse ban nhi raha toh? He should be the one apologizing, not me.”

“Are we still talking about the flour?” Ekansh drawled. “Jahan tak mujhe pata hai, it’s an inanimate thing. And it can’t speak!”

Eshita filled her palm with water, splashing it straight at Ekansh.

Ekansh turned around with a glare. “What was that?”

“Paani!” Eshita smirked. “Water is essential for healthy skin bhatrashree.”

“Kya chaiye tujhe? Aur kab tak aise hi baat karegi mujhse?”

“Jab tak aap promise na kar do ki aap phir se apne haath pair par chot laga kar nhi aaoge,” Eshita huffed.

Ekansh nodded. “I promise, Esha. You know it was unintentional...”

“I don’t care!” Eshita declared, hopping onto the counter. “You got hurt, bhaiya, and that’s not something I can accept. Remember my words? We can break other’s bones, make them bleed...”

“But never hurt ourselves,” Ekansh completed for her. She was twelve when she made him promise that silly rule, but he kept the code they shared, never getting injured recklessly or carelessly until now, when it was actually needed.

“Next time wear gloves. And when you beat the crap out of those jerks, don’t forget to ask me to join. I will happily assist in breaking their bones..”

Ekansh nodded again. “Anything else? Or am I forgiven?”

Eshita pointed at the bowl. “First revive that dough. Then I will decide.”

Ekansh rolled up the sleeves of his T-shirt. “Why are you even making that? Khana banana aata nhi hai. Mujhe nhi awaaz de sakti thi...” He trailed off, noticing the gud near the stove.

His gaze found Eshita avoiding his eyes once again. “What is it? Tujhe toh gud pasand bhi nhi hai na? Then why are you making something with it?”

Eshita cleared her throat. “Bas aise hi iccha hui kuch new try karne ki.”

“Really, Eshu?”

Eshita nodded, avoiding his gaze deliberately. She knew he had already realized exactly what she was trying to make.

Ekansh picked up the bowl. “You added too much water,” He pointed out calmly, adding flour to the mixture to settle the consistency.

“Theek kar do and roll the chapati,” Eshita grumbled, leaning in curiously.

“Accept karne mein kya bigad jayega tera?” Ekansh asked knowingly. “You care for her. Learn to vocalize your emotions, Esha. Not everyone can read you like your family does.”

Eshita leaned back against the counter. “You know me very well, bhaiya. I do that only if someone is ready to return back the same effort to me. I can’t be so selfless without expecting anything in return. Main itni mahaan nhi hoon.”

“Your actions say otherwise.” Ekansh chuckled, taking out the rolling board. “Esha... kabhi kabhi agar hum kisi se pyaar karte hai, unki care karte hai, toh unhe vo care batana zaruri hota hai. Because sometimes someone is too scared to even hope that they deserve someone’s unconditional love. Ekta is just like that. Everything you do for her, even the smallest thing, she will overthink it for days until she finally accepts it.”

“I hate that!”

He turned to his sister, his gaze softening. “I understand. But we can’t do anything about it. We have to accept her for who she is and change the thought process those people forced into her. If she is important to you, if you really accept her as your younger sister, then don’t hesitate to take a step towards her. I never imposed my will on you. I never came in between you two. And I won’t. It’s your choice to make. What you want to be for her... Ekta’s elder sister. Or just mine.”

Eshita nodded reluctantly.

“Now get down. You want to make them or should I...”

“I will.” Eshita huffed, picking up the gud and following Ekansh’s instructions step by step, surprisingly seriously.

Her thoughts spiraled. He was right. It was in her hands. She had already extended her hand towards Ekta, asking for her friendship, but the girl had rejected her. Eventually, now she didn’t know what to accept from Ekta. Eshita Sehgal wasn’t someone who was afraid of rejection. In fact, she had never taken the first step toward anyone’, not even her own family. It was always her family who came to her, pampered her, spoiled her, and loved her loudly.

But Ekta was someone who broke all the well-built walls around her, creating a ruckus within them without even trying. The girl challenged everything Eshita had never questioned about herself, her relationships, and the way she viewed the world.

So much so that today she had decided to make Ekta’s favorite dish’, the one her mother used to make for her. Why? Because she wanted Ekta to feel welcomed, loved, that she belonged here just as much as the rest of them did. But was it really as easy as she thought?

“Here!” Ekansh snapped her out of her thoughts and forwarded the plate once he placed the hot chapati on it. “Now go and give her this.”

Eshita immediately shook her head, stepping back. “Aap hi de do.”

Ekansh placed the plate back on the counter. “Tune banaya hai, tu hi degi. I am not stealing your credits. I will send her here.”

He walked away before she could protest. He wanted both of his sisters to take at least one step towards each other. Eshita had taken hers. Now it was Ekta’s turn, and he would make sure she did. Sometimes actions speak far louder than words, and gestures are often better than explanations. Eshita’s gesture screamed exactly that. Sooner or later, Ekta would understand.

✨✨✨

Ekta walked into the kitchen confused. Ekansh had asked her to come because Eshita had called for her. The girl called her? That was something new. She stepped in only to freeze at the threshold. There stood Eshita, chewing her nails nervously.

“Aapne bulaya?” She asked cautiously.

Eshita looked up startled, lowering her hands. She peeked behind Ekta before sighing in relief. Her brother would have her head for biting her nails like a toddler.

She looked back at Ekta. “Haan vo... maine tumhare liye... I mean mere liye bhi...” She trailed off awkwardly. Fuck! It was very hard.

Ekta frowned. “Aap kya keh rahi hai? Mujhe kuch samajh nhi aa raha hai.”

“Mujhe bhi.” Eshita murmured, shaking her head. She had gone nuts. Turning around, she picked up the plate and forwarded it toward Ekta.

“Yeh maine tumhare liye... I mean I just tried this new dish. Try karna chati ho?”

Ekta stepped inside, her gaze falling on the plate. Her feet rooted to the ground just a few steps away from Eshita. The sight before her stole the breath from her lungs. It was the same dish her mother used to make for her decade ago. Something that was comfort itself for five-year-old her, a tiny reminder that no matter how harsh the surroundings felt, she always had one place where she belonged.

The simple homemade dish brought back memories she had spent years burying. Memories that opened the doors of a heart she had spent years locking away. When was the last time someone had made that for her? No one. No one knew because she never spoke about it. Now that she had revisited her past, the result of it was standing right before her.

Her eyes rose, meeting Eshita’s nervous ones. “Why are you doing this?” She asked the one question she had been holding onto for days.

“Jis din se aapko mere ateet ke baare mein pata chala hai. Main tab se dekh rahi hu. You have changed. You were always kind to me, always respectful, always considerate, but we at least shared a distance. But these days you are trying too hard to make me a part of your life.”

She swallowed hard. “I-I understand okay. I understand your emotions, your care. But I don’t think you have to pity me. You don’t have to feel sorry for me just because my past was horrible. I-I...”

“I am not even interested!” Eshita cut her off immediately.

She set the plate aside, meeting the girl’s gaze firmly. “Pity? We pity those who have everything in their hands but don’t even have the strength to walk. Those who have money but don’t have the luxury to use it. Those who can’t even dare to stand up for themselves, Ekta. And from where I am seeing it, you stood up for yourself. You ran away from a monster. You fought for your life rather than accepting it as your fate! You survived what would have broken most adults.”

Her gaze softened. “So no, I don’t pity you. I admire you. Because despite everything that happened, you are still here, still breathing, still trying. And that takes far more courage than people will ever realize. The girl standing before me carried years of pain all alone and still found the courage to wake up every day and keep moving forward. Something not every nine-year-old can endure.”

Her voice softened a little. “I don’t pity you, Ekta. I never will. Maine tumhari taraf dosti ka haath tumhara sach jaanne se pehle badhaya tha. Aur aaj main tumhari taraf ek aur kadam badha rahi hu.”

She pointed at the plate. “Yeh jo maine kiya... yeh ek badi bhen ne apni choti bhen ke liye kiya hai! Accept karna ya nhi karna tumhari marzi hai. Tumhe kisi ke saath zabardasti ya majboori mein rishta nibhane ki koi zarurat nhi hai. You have a choice in this house. Your own choice. Your own voice to choose what you want.”

She walked past Ekta, stopping at the threshold, her back facing her. “Jis din tum hum dono ke rishte ko naam dogi, uss din Eshita Sehgal apni choti bhen ke liye kya kya kar sakti hai... tum khud samajh jaogi.”

She walked away, leaving behind words that settled deep within Ekta’s heart. Ekta blinked away the tears, wiping them away harshly. What was this new feeling? Why was it so warm and terrifying at the same time? Why wasn’t she shrugging it away, feeling negative or uncomfortable like she always did? What if one day she lost every happiness she was being offered today? Would she be able to survive losing it all over again?

Slowly she turned toward the cold plate. Her fingers trembled as she reached out, tearing a small morsel from it. The moment it touched her tongue, her taste buds leapt in surprise and nostalgia. They weren’t as perfect as her mother used to make. No one could ever match what her mother created with love.

But this new flavour carried something equally precious. Care. Acceptance. A place being offered to her without conditions. It left her overwhelmed in ways she couldn’t explain. Was she finally ready to let someone into the broken corners of her heart once again?

✰✰✰✰✰✰✰✰✰

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